Living Surrendered...

sur·ren·der

səˈrendər/

verb

1. cease resistance to an enemy or opponent and submit to their authority.

2. abandon oneself entirely to (a powerful emotion or influence)

As some of you know I have to follow a strict diet. I had to cut out wheat, black pepper, eggs, dairy, potato and many many other things due to some health issues. It wasn't by choice it was by force. This is a challenge. I LOVE LOVE LOVE bread and ice cream and scrambled eggs and cheese and pizza and pretty much everything about every one of those main food groups! I felt sorry for myself for awhile and just ate plain chicken and rice for almost every meal. I didn't want to try and find stuff to eat I just wanted Jesus to make me better. He healed many people in the Bible and I have heard of so many stories of how people prayed and received healing in present days. So why wouldn't He heal me? Its not like I was deathly sick or even really sick, I am just an inconveniently sick. its not even really sick its more like "special". A "special" where I can't eat everything I want, where I actually have to plan out what I eat, where I can't just go into a gas station and grab anything I want. And boy oh boy did I do that before! Circle K was my grocery store! It was a struggle for awhile, like I said before I felt sorry for myself and pouted, but now I actually try and guess what its fun!! My mom is definitely the one who inspired me to try new things. She has taught me how to make breadsticks I can eat, Alfredo sauce out of cauliflower, and even chocolate cupcakes! It took me awhile to really appreciate having to make food, I am lazy and impatient in the cooking department and really like fast and convenient. So why am I telling you this...because it has changed my life in many ways!

The first way is I obviously feel so much better!!! But on the more spiritual side of things it has taught me what it means to really surrender something you love. Its an everyday battle to chose not to eat food on the "list" (the food does not make me instantly sick, it makes me really sick in the long run). It sounds silly I know: how can not being able to eat stuff teach me about surrendering things, well I will tell you how. I love these foods and I have to give them up. Its hard and Jesus is teaching me how to use an amount of self control I have never had to use ever before. It gives me such a real tangible example on giving up something you love (even if its just a small silly thing you really love). I have to give up my rights to food on a daily basis. It seems small but for me its huge. Jesus has been showing me over these past few months how hard truly giving things up for him can be. In America I feel like we don't struggle very much in other places on giving up things. I especially don't, I have a good job and pretty much have everything I want. So through food, Jesus has taken hold of my heart and been showing me how much one thing can be an idol in our life. I wanted to be mad at God for allowing my body to react to food I love but now I am thankful! It has taught me self control, patience and given me a small small glimpse of what surrendering is. I feel like because of dealing with this I am more aware of His voice and more ready than every to give something up if He asks me too. If its physical or mental or spiritual I am ready to surrender because in the long run, even if we don't understand why, there is a reason why He is asking us to give it up. He only wants the best for us and not to harms. Even though it wasn't Jesus asking me to surrender certain foods, HE is the one who made my body and my love for bread. Something else that I have learned is He wants to bless you! I have learned so many new ways to cook and stores have came out with so many options that as I am typing this I am enjoying a "special" Oreo like cookie. Its still a struggle and some days are worst than others. But when the urge comes to eat that breadstick or bowl of ice cream I can turn to the Lord for help even in the littlest of things. Realizing this has also helped me know how much my Jesus loves me and cares for me and wants to help me. SO even though this simple silly example of surrendering food I hope it shows you that when you obey what the Lord asks of you, either surrendering big or little areas, He will always be there helping and guiding you and in the end just wants you to receive the blessings intended for you!!

1 Corinthians 10:13

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

Psalm 84:11

For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly.

Psalm 37:5

Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act. 

Romans 8:18

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

James 1:2-4

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.